Chapter 8

“All right, so you’ll draw some stuff for my portfolio tonight, right? That’s how this is going to work?”

“Yes,” Mano said, preparing David for his first evening sans his human body. “I’ll draw a few pieces for your portfolio, and then I’m spending some time with Amanda.”

It wasn’t the worst thing ever, David decided. He’d get to rest in the rabbit while Mano did the hard labor. Maybe he’d even get a good night’s sleep for once. That prospect alone made the whole endeavor almost seem worth it.

Mano helped relax David out of his human body and into the rabbit. Then Mano helped David over to the little bed in the corner so he’d be comfortably out of the way.

First things first, Mano thought. I have to create a few drawings so David can take credit for them.

Mano flexed his new fingers a bit and stretched. David had already grabbed his pencil and sketchbook, so Mano didn’t have to dig around for them. He picked up the materials and cringed a little on the inside. He may be a rabbit, but he still knew enough to be embarrassed about a New Kids on the Block pencil.

He grabbed David’s sketchbook and began drawing the room from the view of the couch. The television was more like an artifact from an ancient civilization, and the “entertainment center” was just a lopsided table, but Mano wasn’t trying to show off his interior decorating skills. It was art, which meant people would look at this possible fire hazard on paper and say it has “personality.”

For his next drawing, Mano grabbed an orange colored-pencil. He was almost finished with his second drawing when Amanda returned home from shopping with her friends.

“David?”

It took Mano a moment to remember Amanda meant him.

“Yes, Amanda?”

“Why is there a bowl of carrots on the table?”

I keep forgetting she’s blonde.

“It’s called a still-life…”

What the hell did David call her? Sweetie? Honey? Shmoochie-kins?

“Hon,” Mano finished.

“You’re still trying to draw?”

“Yes, hon,” Mano said. “Yes, I am.”

He held up his completed drawing and felt a surge of arrogant satisfaction when Amanda gasped.

“Oh… oh my god,” she said. “Did you get lessons?”

“Something like that.” Mano tried not to let his smile get too big. Amanda didn’t know it, but she was currently in awe of the creature that she had once dressed in pink lace.

Mano hated pink lace.

“You know, why don’t you sit down over here,” Mano said, leading Amanda to the sofa. “You are too beautiful not to draw.”

If David had asked her to do that yesterday, she would have said no. But it wasn’t yesterday.

Mano pulled up a chair and began drawing. He made sure to make her lips a little poutier, her eyes a little bigger. She was pretty, but there was no harm in exaggerating. The more confident she felt, the more fun he could have.

“There we go,” he said, putting on the finishing touches. “Would you like to see?”

For the first time since Mano had arrived there, Amanda seemed shy. It was cute.

He held the sketchbook out to her.

“Oh… wow…” She looked from the drawing to Mano, her eyes full of adoration and a primal hunger.

Oh, God. Tonight was going to be fun.

David turned over groggily in his bed when the alarm blared in his ear. Getting out of bed was more difficult than usual; his entire body was stiff and sore and screaming at him to lie back down. On top of that, it didn’t feel like he’d gotten so much as an hour of sleep.

Something was odd, and it took David a minute to realize Amanda wasn’t lying next to him in bed. He took in the rest of their bedroom. Bottles and books that had been on the dressers were now on the floor, as if someone had just knocked them off. It looked like a colony of rabbits had torn through there.

That was almost true, except it wasn’t a colony of wild rabbits. In this case, it was just one rabbit.

MANO?!

A very rested voice responded lazily a few moments later.

Hmmm?

What the hell happened last night?

Well, if how I feel is any indication, I got a really good night’s sleep.

My body feels like I ran ten marathons!

I wouldn’t call what I did running, but the word marathon seems appropriate.

David stumbled on his screaming legs through the hall and into the living room, where a naked Amanda was lying draped over the couch.

Oh my god, you killed her!

What? I did not kill her, you moron; she’s just worn out.

You… Wait, that’s possible? I thought she was, you know… un-tire-out…able?

You mean “inexhaustible”?

Yeah, that.

Well, apparently she’s not.

But, I—

If you say it, I’ll be forced to insult you.

David didn’t take the hint.

But, I never—

I guess you’re just not that good.

Yeah, he walked right into that one.

David stumbled around the living room a little more, taking in the disarray and checking for Amanda’s pulse just in case. Even though he knew what he was seeing, it took his tired brain a little while to fully come to terms with it.

I didn’t agree to this, David thought, pretty sure it was the truth.

You complain constantly about having sex with her.

That doesn’t mean I want someone else to do it!

Fine. Mano didn’t bother to argue or object; he had no worries that David might back out of their agreement.

David dressed himself, slowly and painfully, and was about to leave for work alone when he spotted his sketchbook on the coffee table. He picked it up and flipped to the newest entries.

The apartment was alive with silence; Mano could hear the defeat in the way David swallowed.

Without saying a word, David picked up Mano and carried the rabbit with him to work.

No pain, no gain.

Every couple days, this acted as David’s mantra, but he was pretty sure it wasn’t meant for situations like this. Sometimes, even two days didn’t feel like enough recuperation time, but that didn’t seem to hinder Mano.

“I need an extra day,” David said as he cleaned the aquariums. “I can’t… I need a rest.”

“That means no new drawings,” Mano said.

“That’s okay.”

“And Amanda will be horribly disappointed.”

It was getting harder and harder for David to hide his seething resentment of Amanda’s newfound joy. She had never been this happy after sex with him.

“She’s still having sex with you, you know.”

“Don’t read my thoughts! You spend enough time in my head as it is.”

Mano gave his usual mental shrug.

“I’m going drinking with Rodney tonight,” David said. “I haven’t been doing that nearly enough the past couple weeks.”

“Drowning in alcohol hardly counts as recuperation.”

“It’s what I’m doing!”

There was silence as David continued scrubbing down the tanks. He was pretty sure whatever was gunking up the glass could be classified as a biological weapon.

“Hey… What does Amanda think about when she’s with you?”

“How should I know?”

David paused. “What? But you—“

“Telepathy is a rabbit thing,” Mano said. “I can’t do it from your brain.”

“Wait, really?”

“All rabbits communicate telepathically,” Mano said. “That’s why we have such big ears; they’re more like satellite dishes than hearing aids.”

“Oh…” David paused, thinking it over. “Wait, are you fucking with me right now?”

“You’ll never know.”

After cleaning the tanks, David fed the animals, played with a few of the more rambunctious oddities, and balanced the register (it’s easy when you don’t make a single sale). He kept his word and went straight to the bar after work.

Rodney sat down across from his friend and chuckled. “Jesus, man, you look like shit.”

David did the friendly thing and flipped him off.

“Sobriety does not agree with you,” Rodney continued. “We need to get a few beers in you.”

David had no arguments there. He drank the first mug of beer faster than Rodney could get through half.

Rodney paused and watched his friend closely. “You wanna tell me what’s been going on?”

David shrugged and flagged the waitress for another beer. What the hell could he say? That he’d been letting a rabbit fuck his girlfriend in exchange for some drawings?

David’s mouth twitched. It sounded really bad when you put it that way.

“Maybe you should start taking a flask with you to work,” Rodney said.

No.

“It might do you some good, Vid.”

Absolutely not.

“I think Selzer might notice that,” David said. “Otherwise, I would’ve started doing it years ago.”

Rodney started to nod when a passing girl caught his attention.

Wow, she has a nice ass.

Is that all you think about?

It’s all Rodney thinks about, Mano said, dodging the question.

“I thought you had that new intern,” David said, bailing from his conversation with Mano.

“Her?” Rodney said. “She was fun. A little clingy, though.”

By clingy, he meant that she called him once; it was more than he wanted out of a relationship.

It took a few more beers, but soon David was bantering with his friend like things were back to normal. Every once in a while, he felt Mano’s presence in his head, so David made sure to get roaring drunk.